Gotta Love the Local Decor

I'll be the first to admit that I don't do much in the way of decorating the yard. I mow. I try to keep the weeds down. I occasionally use the edger. I sometimes trim the hedges out front. That's about it. When I lived at my former bachelor pad, the most I ever did was throw some ivy into an empty flowerbed around a 100-year oak. It was great, because it filled the area up without any effort or watering on my part.

I have no desire to do gardening or decorating. The only reason I do it myself as opposed to some service is because it's an easy way for us to save money, and we need every method of thrift we can find right now. Of course, it'd be nice to have a cool landscape in the backyard, but I'm not going to put forth that kind of effort. Whenever Mrs. the Jim starts bringing in the cash, I'll have my personal landscape architect (AKA The Official College Roommate of The Jim) design something for us. Until then, we'll make do with plain grass and occasional weeds.

I mention all of this because I want it perfectly clear that I do not perform yard decorating because it takes effort to do it right. I find it fascinating, then, when someone puts in even more effort to do it completely and absolutely wrong.

I recently had a dental checkup. My dentist (who I still think has one of the top 5 jobs out there) has an office in a small, refurbished house in the downtown area of our little suburb. On the way back to my office, I drove through the surrounding neighborhood and noticed what may be the greatest yard decoration of all time. Ladies & gentlemen, I give you ...





THE GOLDEN HORSE

OF NORTH TEXAS

This thing fills me with joy and wonder! First of all, why would you obviously put so much effort to install something so woefully hideous? Does this person have no friends or neighbors to point out how ridiculous this looks? What was the inspiration for this person to put out a giant horse, and where do you get such a thing? Can I get one as well, or is a special permit required? Why, oh why, would you paint it gold?

The only way this think could be better is if flames were shooting out of its nostrils. Well, now that I've seen the local standards, my landscape architect has something to strive towards.

Until next time,
The Jim