Sorry it's taken me so long to get into writing here in The Big Oh-Nine. I rarely take time off from work, so this year, I took a rather extended one. We traveled around to visit family all over, which ended up being a large distraction from my main duties as the Internet's Poet Laureate.So, how did the holidays go? Well, I was lazy (more on this later), and I got a pretty good haul (later). You want the details now? Well tough!! As hard as it is for me to come up with topics, do you honestly think I'm going to blow it all on the first post of the year?
Anyway, all of this is moot, because I've got some GI-NORMOUS news for everyone ... I'M RICH, FOOLS! You see, a couple of days ago, I received the following e-mail:Congratulations, New year Winner 2009!
The UK E-LOTTERY wishes to inform you that you have won £950,000.00,in an online Sweepstakes International program held in January,2009. To file for your claim, please contact fudiciary agent:Barrister Henry Preston. E-mail: barrhenrypreston@sbcglobal.net
Congratulations,
UK E-LOTTERY BOARD
NOTE:Ensure that you file your claim to barrhenrypreston@sbcglobal.net
Of course, anyone would be skeptical about an e-mail purporting to award tons of cash; however, please notice that this is from the UK E-LOTTERY, not some Nigerian prince trying to run a scam. I mean, this Henry Preston guy is a barrister ... he must be legitimate, right?Needless to say, we're pretty excited at Casa del Jim. £950,000 is roughly $1.4 million, so that's a major windfall for us. Sure, the taxes will be rough, but I'm not going to complain about free money.
Now you may be asking why I - a random dude in North Texas - should win such an award. I certainly didn't enter any kind of sweepstakes, nor did I buy a lottery ticket. I did, however, go to the UK on my honeymoon over a year ago. Based on this fact, the only reasonable assumption to be made is that anyone who ever steps foot in the UK is automatically entered in this contest. Really, they should hype that up more on the travel brochures. That would be a huge selling point over those other countries.
I'm not sure how this prestigious organization got a hold of my e-mail address. I sincerely hope, however, it had something to do with MI-6, Q, and James Bond. And maybe that jetpack from Thunderball - that thing was awesome!So I'm not sure how this impacts the lives of you, my faithful readers? I'm sure I'll quit my day job, so you'll lose the occasional stories about the exciting world of engineering. This will, however, free me up to write more frequently, which means more posts about a talking French gorilla in love with a disembodied mad scientist's brain! All in all, it's a win for everybody.
Until next time,
The Jim
1 comment:
So far, I haven't gotten my first lottery check yet, so I haven't made any big purchases.
From what I understand, those checks will be coming soon. There was some confusion, because I had forgotten to give them my bank account number, SSN, date of birth, and credit card numbers. (I guress they needed those for proof of identity.) Now that I've given them everything, things should be perfect now.
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