First of all, I wasn't even in the dream. It was more of a movie my brain decided to create for me - my own Theater of the Brain. A child meets some homeless guy on the street, and the dude is clearly deranged. He may, in fact, be schizophrenic, but I can't make an accurate diagnosis based on this story.
The young child (played by Haley Joel Osment) befriends the man, and tries to help him. I think the crazy guy may have been played by Bryan Cranston (the dad from Malcolm in the Middle), but I might be mixing that up with an ad for Breaking Bad I saw yesterday. It's hard to keep things straight when you're recalling a dream.(By the way, the kid or the crazy guy may have had a dog. I'm pretty sure there was a dog in the final scene, but I'm not sure to whom it belonged, if anyone.)
My brain apparently was bored with the plot build-up, so I jumped straight to the final scene. The boy and the crazy dude somehow end up in a different part of town, or a different city entirely. The whack-job sees something on a TV in a store window, and instantly starts screaming "LOCAL NEWS!" Something has triggered his memory, and he starts trudging down the street. Eventually, he ends up in a dining room with some very ornate and well-maintained furniture. (Really, all I remember is a very nice dining room table, but I'm sure there were some chairs and such.) Somebody walks in from the kitchen, and it's ... another kid who also looks like Haley Joel Osment (except with wild hair and possibly a Grizzly Adams beard for some reason).
The other kid is extremely calm - almost Spock-like - as he relays the story that the crazy guy is his father. The mother died almost 4 years ago, and their finances began to dwindle. The father had to sell off pretty much everything, but he refused to get rid of his wife's favorite possession - her formal dining set. People hounded after him, because apparently this table is quite impressive. Somehow, this led to his subsequent insanity, although my Theater of the Brain didn't clearly explain that train of events.In his father's absence, the son survived on his own and maintained the furniture. Apparently, he's had the table appraised and it's worth $900,000! In the background, the crazy father is loudly weeping, presumably with joy.
Needless to say, this little tale left me with several questions:
- How did the man's son survive on his own for 4 years? Wouldn't someone have noticed this kid all alone?
- Was the guy already crazy? Was he, in fact, schizophrenic? Was he always crazy, and he became uncontrollable without his wife's care? For some reason, I was left with the impression that the antiques buyers who coveted the table actually drove him insane, but how is THAT possible?
- Why on earth was the son so incredibly cold and logical while relaying the story? I distinctly remember the father going monkey-butt crazy with the sobbing, but the son was acting like he was telling some dude about his day at work.
- Why $900,000? Why not a million, or 5 million? Why would I settle on that sum?
- How can a character look like Haley Joel Osment with a Grizzly Adams beard? I can't even conceive of that logically!
I haven't the slightest notion what any of this means. I often have exceptionally odd dreams, but rarely do I recall them when I awake. Why would this one stay with me?
Am I destined to go crazy over a dining room table? Will I have a son who looks like Haley Joel? Should I grow a beard and live with bears? Or did I just eat too much for Memorial Day?
Really, this is almost as confusing as the time I had the dream about Jabberjaws. (And yes, that actually happened!)
Until next time,
The Jim
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